Most couples experiment with manual stimulation only in the early days of their relationship. It all but stops once oral and penetrative intercourse begin. But there is no need for it to be excluded altogether – the hands can be used to pleasure a woman till she quivers! Manual stimulation can be a satisfying experience and it helps you learn a lot about her body. Just make sure there are no open wounds on your hands or fingers before you exchange body fluids with her – if there are, wear latex gloves or some other protective covering so that there is no exchange of infections.
Each woman is different and she likes to be touched differently. And yet, every woman masturbates and she knows what really gets her going. If she is open to the idea, ask her to masturbate in front of you so that you can see what she does and how she likes it. Gently place your hand over hers to know how she turns it, how she flexes it, which fingers she uses and how much pressure she applies at certain spots.
Many women are too shy or hesitant to masturbate in front of their partners, so you should find out on your own. Use both hands, taking care to explore her breasts, caress her thighs, stroke her clitoris…then use a finger to gently penetrate her. Enter her with only one finger at first, and if she likes it, you can use more.
It is better to use lube so that your fingers glide over her skin more sensually and help in arousal. Lube also helps your finger penetrate her smoothly without chafing.
Do remember that her clitoris is not restricted only to the button of flesh where you think it is – it is longer than that and you can arouse her by cupping the pubic mound and gently rocking your hand in a rhythm. Other techniques include:
Spreading her labia with the fingers of one hand, and placing the palm on the clitoris, use the fingers of the other hand for manual penetration.
Sliding your fingers up and down her clitoris in a quick V-shape.
Tapping her clitoris and pubic mound with the pad of your finger.
Moving your fingers around her clitoris in smaller and smaller circles.
You can try different pressures, speeds and rhythms on her to see what really blows her mind. But always be gentle in the beginning, especially around the clitoris, because it can be really sensitive.
You are not required to use your hands on her only to get sex – touching her sensually and with love shows her that you adore her and love to pleasure her. It is an easy way to arouse her and bring her to a climax when you are too tired for penetrative sex. It can also be a great thing to do if you climax before her and want her to come as well.
Remember to start gently and work your way up - the clit can be highly sensitive.