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10 Mistakes That Make Anal Sex Dangerous and Unsafe

August 22, 2023

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10 Mistakes That Make Anal Sex Dangerous

Anal sex can be quite an exhilarating experience. However, those who haven’t tried it may wonder, “Is anal sex safe?” Before you begin your backdoor explorations, it’s important to know how to have anal sex safely and how to avoid its risks.

Is It Safe to Have Anal Sex?

In general, anal sex is safe, healthy, and deliciously pleasurable - but only if the right practices are followed. For instance, inadequate lubrication or forcing entry can kill the mood and even cause an infection. Here we’ll discuss 10 other sexual behaviors and/or that can make anal sex dangerous – and what you can do to make it safe for you and your partner.   

1. Using too little lubricant

When it comes to anal sex, wetter is always better, and the only way to get wetter is to use lots of sex lubricant. That’s because the anus does not self-lubricate. Using too little lubricant can cause tears in delicate anal tissue, which is not only painful but also increases the risk of contracting a sexually transmitted infection (STI) like HIV.

We recommend using a silicone-based lubricant like Durex Real Feel, as it stays wetter for longer. Just remember not to use silicone lubricants with silicone personal devices, as it can ruin the material!

2. Using the wrong kind of lubricant

Generally, you’ll want to pair anal play with a silicone-based, not only do they ensure a smooth experience, but also lasts long compared to water-based lubricants. However, using an oil-based lubricant is a big-no for anal sex. Most oil-based lubes are made using natural oils which might be good for your skin, but not for intimate areas.

You also want to avoid numbing lubricants, which are marketed as something that will get rid of pain. While it will certainly do so, pain is a natural way of your body letting you know if something isn’t right. Using a numbing lubricant can make you fail to notice tears or injury until after the fact. Read this guide on the choosing right lubricant.

Durex Lube to try for anal sex

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3. Not using condoms

No matter how strong your emotional connection is with your partner, it's important to consistently use a condom for anal intercourse. Condoms not only protect against unwanted pregnancy, but they also safeguard against infections and sexually transmitted diseases associated with anal sex.

As stated by the Mayo Clinic, your anus harbours various types of bacteria, including gastrointestinal (GI) bacteria like E. coli. Your vagina is not naturally equipped to deal with these potentially harmful bacteria. Moving between the anus and vagina can introduce these bacteria to the vaginal area, potentially leading to infections such as bacterial vaginosis.

Pro Tip:
After having anal intercourse, remove the condom and put on a new one before inserting the penis into the vagina

4. Forcing your entry

Slow sex is good sex, and this is especially true for anal sex. There’s no mood killer like rushing the process and forcing the entry before the receiving partner is ready.

Before anything else, the receiving partner must be fully relaxed and give enthusiastic consent to anal exploration. Start by inserting a lubricated finger or two during oral sex. Once your partner is comfortable with having things in their bum, you can step up to insert an anal-safe device, and eventually the penis. 

5. Having long fingernails

If you’re inserting your fingers into your partner’s anus, make sure your fingernails are neatly trimmed without sharp edges. Long fingernails can cause tears and scratches to the delicate anal tissue.

6. Inserting personal devices not made for anal play

Did you know that some personal devices can be dangerous to your anus? Anal-safe devices always come with a flared base, which keeps it in place and prevents it from getting lost in the anal cavity.

So before you insert anything up the butt, check that it has a flared base, or risk dashing to the emergency room.

7. Using the same condom for both anal and vaginal sex

Never use the same condom when switching from anal to vaginal sex. Doing so can transfer bacteria from the anus that can cause vaginal infections, urinary tract infections, or even gastrointestinal infections.     

8. Taking sexual enhancement drugs    

To relax the anal sphincter and make anal sex comfortable, people resort to using drugs like amyl nitrate (popularly known as ‘poppers'). However, there is no medical evidence to support this, and a strong drug like amyl nitrate could have serious side effects, like convulsions, and dangerous changes in one’s blood pressure levels.

9. Believing that pain is normal

Sex of any kind should feel pleasurable, and the same goes for anal sex.  Anal sex, when done correctly, should not feel painful.  If you are at the receiving end, you must express any discomfort or pain. Ignoring this could lead to risks of injury and other serious issues.

10. Ignoring your partner's request to stop

The consent of both partners is of utmost importance in any sexual act. If the receiving partner faces discomfort and wishes to discontinue, it must be respected by the giving partner.  Ignoring the request to stop could cause physical injury as well as emotional trauma.

4 Bonus Tips to Make Anal Sex Pleasurable

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Now that you know what NOT to do, here are some ways to enjoy your anal sex adventures:

1. Go solo!

If you’re nervous about trying anal play with a partner, get yourself an anal toy and try it out alone. A butt plug or anal beads could help you get an idea of how it feels.

2. Relax yourself

You must relax your mind, body, and the muscles around the anal area. Indulge in anal massage and foreplay and work your way towards it.

3. Have a safe word

Be it vaginal or anal sex, a safe word is essential for communication. This helps you understand boundaries and feel safe. If possible, make your sex word completely unrelated to sex, such as “pineapple”.

4. Say yes to aftercare

Indulge in activities like talking, cuddling, or having a snack together. This helps you connect and understand your partner better.

Anal sex is an activity best enjoyed when there is respect, awareness, and care between the partners. Every sexual activity comes with its pros and cons; however, you can make it an experience packed with pleasure by understanding the risks and taking the right precautions. Always remember to listen to the signals sent out by your body and have open communication with your partner. 

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